How the Other Half Can Almost Live

As much as I enjoy playing Robin Leech, I’d like to take a break from pandering to the seven-figure set for a moment. Nice as the properties I’ve blathered about have been, the fact is that most Americans still can’t afford to buy any home, let alone these Olympian berths.

So today’s post is dedicated to properties separated from the working man only by a few lucky scratch tickets, knocked-over package stores, or corporate class-action settlements. And who knows – thanks to long-overdue deflation, Back Bay may one day serve Snuffy Smith (pictured at right) as readily as it serves that guy from the Monopoly game (not pictured at all because the jerks at Hasbro have him under copyright).

124 Beacon Street, #GR – $289,900. When you’re on a shoestring, it’s best to remember the Raymond K. Hessel Rule – letters mean you’re in the basement. But hey, it’s a seriously nice basement, with stylish fixtures and appliances; not much space, but a very chichi location. It’s a Blanche Dubois kind of pad – you can’t afford the whole nine yards, but you crave prestige and luxury just the same.

1091 Boylston #3 – $219,000. The corner of Back Bay south of the Pike is kind of like the cuff on your favorite pair of pants. It’s scummy and stained from so many nights out, but dang it, you love those pants. Yes, you’ll have to deal with college students and homeless people near this condo. Yes, the Neighborhood Association will deny you entry. But with a fantastic array of late-night eateries on your doorstep, easy T access, and more bars than you could ever want just down the road, you could have one heck of a social life in this place.

290 Comm Ave – $299,900. Being of rural stock, I tend to prefer a little more space in my domiciles, and this studio delivers, especially for the price point. Again, we’re in a basement, but it’s a sunny basement. Sure, the bathroom’s a bit of an afterthought, but with a low, all-inclusive homeowner’s association fee, and short walk to the “fun” (as opposed to “expensive”) ends of Newbury and Boylston, I think this place would be my pick of the three.

illustration: “Snuffy Smith”. Character originally created by Billy DeBeck. Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons.