The Importance of Rules – Please Play Nice

I’ve been told I have the persona of a school teacher.  I’m a little uptight, like routine and am a stickler for rules.  I like to buck the system and climb on my soapbox when I feel wronged or see others wronged, but for the most part I am more comfortable with a society that accepts certain behaviors as moral truths.  I like rules because I truly believe they define the playing field.  They let us know what we can expect from others and what they can expect from us.  When those understandings are broken or breached it leads to a breakdown that often cannot be repaired or (at best) erodes trust and creates major obstacles between people.

I recently read an article by Bob Bruss in which he said “[t]he asking price of a home should be inconsequential to the price you offer.”  I completely disagree.  An asking price is a rule of sorts; one that is negotiable, but a rule nonetheless.  It tells buyers what a seller considers to be the value of their home and sets down one of the basic parameters around which they are willing to deal.  Sellers expect buyers to negotiate, but they don’t expect to be disregarded.  Ignoring the asking price is like not acknowledging their partnership in the transaction.

There are other unspoken rules in real estate that are basic to a successful deal.  For example, buyers expect honesty in disclosures.  They don’t like secrecy or deception.  When the inspection report comes back, if there are glaring defects that were not disclosed by the seller, there will be an instant distrust between the parties.  Similarly, buyers don’t like it when sellers over glorify their properties and sellers don’t like it when buyers pretend to be disinterested in a home when they really are, just for the purpose of hiding their excitement for fear that a seller will play hardball on price.

The best transactions between people are those in which both the buyer and seller are genuine, authentic and motivated.  Primarily driven by a desire to make the other whole or at least full enough.  When one party is trying to take advantage of the other, the deal just doesn’t feel right and, while it may or may not succeed, it will leave a lasting impression and taint the relationship.  They say all is fair in love and war, but that implies that you should expect to get burned.  People buying and selling homes don’t have those same expectations.  They just don’t.  If you want a fair price on a home, your best bet is to lead with your mind and follow your gut.  If your deal starts to take on a sour tone it might be time to reconsider and move on.

Recent San Diego Sweet Digs Posts:

Mixed Messages and Puppeteer Pricing

Just Another Friday Open House List

Price Watcher Plus!  A Dose of Caution and an Ounce of Advice

First Time Buyer Bargains